Fonte/Source: chronline.com
The Chronicle tells what could easily be a hidden story of life in Lewis County, with the intention of helping report the diverse experiences of our neighbors.
Tina Alexis waits to have her eyebrows waxed and plucked at a salon in Chehalis Wednesday. Alexis was born a man.
Transgender: Centralia Resident Relives the Hardship, Joy and Process of Changing Her Gender Forever
Tina Alexis always knew she was a woman, ever since she was a little boy.
She used to play with dolls, liked to wear her little sister’s pretty clothing, and consistently wore makeup.
Though the 50-year-old Logan District resident is currently equipped with male genitalia, she prefers the female title as she works her way through the process of gender reconstruction.
Tina is a transsexual, defined as anyone who believes they should be or are truly the opposite sex.
“I felt female ever since I can remember,” Tina said Wednesday. “Now I want it to show on the outside. My size sort of gives me away.”
Indeed, at 6 feet 2 inches tall, Tina’s stocky build is contrasted by the purple and pink highlights in her hair and the floral-print dress she wore Wednesday. She said a face lift, hormone treatments and genital reconstruction will fix that.
But the process of physically changing a male into a female is a long and taxing one — not only for the doctors who need proof that Tina wants to go through with the surgery, but for Tina herself. The decision comes with a vast array of drama, emotion and self-reflection, she said.
Stuck Inside a Man’s Body
Tina said she wouldn’t have even considered the change 30 years ago. Homophobia was much more widespread, even in areas such as Seattle and Portland that now have a growing acceptance for the gay and transsexual community, she said.
Still struggling with her sexual identity throughout her 20s, Tina tried everything to try and stay masculine: she drove a pickup truck, worked manual labor jobs, attempted a husky voice, and even got married and conceived two kids.
She and her ex-wife divorced in 1999, but she still has an ongoing, stable relationship with her 15-year-old son and 18-year-old daughter.
“You go through a lot of mental issues in this process,” she said. “I’ve lost friends and family over it, but made plenty of new ones.”
She said her parents and many of her siblings turned their backs on her since she came out as a woman nearly six months ago, though she said she still has supportive friends.
But it wasn’t easy living a lie for so long.
“I started becoming suicidal as a man trying to look masculine, and I couldn’t take it anymore,” she said. “I felt feminine anyway, and thought people would figure me out.”
She said she waited cautiously for the time when her kids would be old enough to understand the change, as well as a time when she’d be more accepted in American society.
Taking on the Persona
In order to undergo the genital reconstructive surgery, doctors require that the patient look, act, and feel like the opposite gender every day for at least a year. Patients also go through therapy sessions where psychologists determine whether they’re fit to make such a decision.
Tina changed her name from John in April by recommendation of one of those therapists. She paints her nails, wears jewelry and has girlfriends help her pick out matching outfits that women would wear.
Since she stands out as her female persona, she’s had her fair share of problems. She was attacked recently by five men while visiting her daughter in Corvallis. She said the men started calling her “fag,” surrounded her on the street and punched her.
She was assaulted again at a bar in Chehalis, when a woman came up and groped her while she sang karaoke.
She didn’t call the police on either occasion. She was too scared and shocked.
The fear most likely stems from a sexual molestation case involving a Seattle Catholic priest when she was 12 or 13 years old, she said. She said that case was later settled in court.
Now somewhat fearful of men, Tina said she prefers women sexually and considers herself a lesbian.
“I don’t really go to places with bikers or rednecks anymore,” Tina said. “I frequent a lot of gay bars, or places that are more friendly so I can do karaoke.”
As she gains a repertoire of accepting friends, the fear is slowly dissipating, she said.
Friends in Centralia said she’s strong for going through with her commitment. One said she supports Tina in whatever she does, and is protective of her in public situations.
The Procedure
Dr. Gary Alter is a plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills, Calif., specializing in male-to-female reconstruction for the past 13 years. Tina will undergo the surgery in Thailand, where many of her transsexual friends have traveled for a cheaper operation, but Alter offered some insight as to how the reconstruction works.
He said before a patient reaches him, they’ve already gone through hormone treatment that will give a man breasts, as well as therapy to make sure their decision is the right one.
Tina will start hormone treatment in Portland next week in order to grow real breasts. The process continues with surgery in about a year or two, when doctors will use existing male parts to create new genitalia.
Alter said once the surgery is successful, there should be no concern that new medical problems will arise.
Tina was rejected by Lewis County doctors who didn’t believe she needed hormone treatment or reconstruction surgery, so she said she’ll have to relocate to Portland for a while to find good doctors.
Advice
Tina said it’s important for anyone who’s gay, transsexual, straight or otherwise to be themselves. People will eventually accept differences, she said, even worship centers like the Unity church she attends regularly in Centralia.
She said there is always going to be some level of inner turmoil when someone holds a secret, so let it out.
“I finally feel free now,” Tina said. “I’ve endured many hardships over the years, but I’m the happiest right now than I’ve ever been in my whole life.”
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