by Susan Riley
Recently I received news that a sister in my chapter has taken her own life. Although I do not know if her dressing was a contributor or not, her passing really hits home about the danger we in the gender community face. Most statistics show that better than 50% of TG people attempt suicide, often more than once. I will be perfectly honest here, I myself have attempted it three times. Roughly 30% of TG people succeed in taking their lives. The Transgender community has one of the highest, if not the highest, rate of suicide of any group.
Being transgendered is not the direct cause of these suicides, but rather depression that is often triggered by being TG. According to suicide.org, untreated depression is the number one cause of suicide. We as transgender individuals often face a very hard life that easily contributes to depression and ultimately suicide if the issues most of us face remain unresolved. Being TG is often a lonely affair, society shuns us, and loved ones often do not accept us. Many of us have at times in our lives have tried to deny who we are in order to fit into society, only to learn that we cannot deny ourselves without causing ourselves considerable harm, often leading to depression.
Often we have to fight our battle with depression alone, especially if your spouse or family are unaware of your crossdressing. Depression is very very difficult to deal with on your own, help is needed. If you cannot confide in your spouse or family because they do not know, then it is important that you find somebody who can give you support. In our case, many of our Tri-Ess sisters have had to deal with the same problems that we do, they know how you feel and can give you some caring help to help you through your troubles. They have been through the fire and came out of it, they can help you do the same.
Therapy is also very highly recommended to anybody who is dealing with depression. A specialist in gender issues is preferred, but if none of these are available in your area then another therapist will do. It is best to interview any therapist and find out what their opinions on gender issues are and only select a therapist that you feel comfortable talking about your issues with.
We as Tri-Ess members should be on the lookout for anybody (including ourselves) that show any of the following signs:
1. Mood that is altered from the norm.
2. Withdrawal from the group, friends, or family.
3. Feelings of worthlessness.
4. Feelings of no hope.
5. Feelings of being trapped.
6. Talking about suicide or death.
7. Abuses drugs or alcohol.
8. Changes in eating habits.
9. Changes in sleeping habits.
10. Feelings of excessive guilt or shame.
11. Feelings of depression that last longer than a few days.
12. Personality changes.
13. Loss of interest in most things.
These are all signs of suicide and if you or somebody that you know exhibits these signs then suicide may be a very real danger. Anybody who exhibits these signs (including yourself) needs to contact a therapist immediately and seek help.
Depression can be cured, and if treated the desire to end one's life disappears. Many of those that had attempted suicide and survived it and were able to work out their problems and get their depression under control went on to live happy lives and were very grateful that they did not succeed in their suicide attempt.
WHAT IS CAUSING DEPRESSION AND THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE IS TEMPORARY.
Life should not be thrown away for something that will pass. A therapist can help to work through these issues and help to overcome these feelings and allow one to go on and live a happy life.
Suicide is an emergency situation. If you or somebody you know is in imminent danger of suicide then call 911 and get help. Here are also some toll free suicide hotlines that can help:
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)
Due to the unique challenges we as TG people face, suicide is a very present and real danger. If you are the one considering this option, reach out and get help, there is help for you. If you know somebody who is heading down this road then reach out to them, help them to get help. Suicide should NEVER be an option!